Staying on Track is Misleading
Posted April 30, 2023.
Est. Reading Time: 3 minutes.
I am struggling to finish the work I already have. How can I ever reach my other goals?
This is a normal thought to have when you’re juggling school, work, parenting, or any combination requiring your commitment.
I’m writing for this blog again, roughly one year since my last post. If you’re like me, visualizing routine helps you remain disciplined. If one unexpected thing leads to another, then chaos begins creeping into my days. Long-term goals seem to become distant as commitment to them becomes forgotten.
I would like to provide you with some encouragement to reframe your experience. It’s not so much about falling off or getting back on track, it’s about continuing your path towards becoming a better you. It’s about growing into someone a little bit better than yesterday.
Staying on track can be misleading. It implies you know more about life’s twists and turns than you can know. Your values, beliefs, or goals are more like compasses or destinations, not tracks or paths. There are many paths in our lives, many leading to similar challenges and rewards, yet still unique because of our personal experiences and decisions. This has certain implications about the uncertainties we will encounter, the things we can and cannot control.
I’m…
- Falling behind.
- Barely keeping up.
- Lost.
I…
- Don’t have what it takes.
- Should have known better.
- Give up.
So, how have I dealt with my thoughts questioning the path I am on?
Embrace some uncertainty. I can be both confident and scared. It’s what creates courage and bravery. I don’t know everything the future holds, so I must decide how fear and courage will define me.
Decide what’s most important. I ask myself, “Am I currently doing something to achieve one of my long-term goals?” Life provides a limited amount of time. Yet I am still capable of living a fulfilled life. This is because fulfillment will always find something to strive towards as accomplishments are reached. When I feel overwhelmed over a particular task, I remind myself what commitment it is helping me keep. Is it success in school? In writing? Having a happy family? Sometimes I must decide amongst things that are important to me. It’s then that I choose what’s most important at that very moment.
What’s the least I can do to move towards my goal. This suggestion is like the “small steps” a person takes towards his or her goals. I like the first one better (the law of minimum) because it’s more useful when my plate is full. Lately I haven’t been able to gradually invest more resources towards a given goal. But it’s better to dedicate “x” amount of time indefinitely than no time at all. (It could be a daily minimum or a weekly minimum, be flexible). This is because any amount of time, no matter how minimal, will accumulate and will form a habit.
Listen to the part that is worrying. If I’m not worrying about the present, I might be worrying about the past or present. A part of me always wants to worry. I’ve come to appreciate this part instead of trying to dominate it or get rid of it. In real time, there’s a subtle difference in how I choose to interact with my worries. I might either accept them or ignore them. If I listen to these thoughts, I learn more about the part of me being resistant or hesitant. This part has been my protector.
If you’re still in school, still at your job, still raising your kids, still showing up, give yourself some credit. It’s more important to continue growing than to indefinitely stop. A goal can be forgotten and remembered faster than a routine or habit. Your actions and decisions are shaping the person who will judge the path you’ve taken. It is you tomorrow, next year, in three years, and ten years from now.